This post has been long due and I almost forgot that I mentioned I would write about my experience of meeting A’s parents here.
We went to Nepal during August of 2012 to inform our parents that we want to get married and get their blessings to fix a date. I was a little nervous about meeting A’s Mom and Dad. My family and his family are totally different and my relationship with my parents and his relationship with his parents are different too. A’s relationship with his parents are a little formal and they barely talk about day to day activities. They talk about important family matters and discuss about big family decisions. But the story of me and my family is totally different. We share almost everything, I talk to my parents on a daily basis over Skype, except during weekends and we talk for long hours. If there is any day I’m unable to Skype, the next day my mom will say, “I feel like its been a lot of days since we’ve talked, isn’t it?”. The topic of conversation is usually food-what did you eat for lunch/dinner and so on and how was your day? Its also because my mom stays at home and she misses us a lot. Her life has always been about me and my brother, daily household chores and religion and spirituality. So when she asks me to come over Skype every single day, I cannot say no too and it does get difficult/frustrating at times but it makes her happy :).
Attendees from my side:
Mom, Bua(Dad), my cousin brother and me
Attendees from A’s side:
A’s Mom, A’s Dad, A’s Grandmom, A’s elder sister her husband and her kid
Venue: A restaurant in K City
So, lets get back to the topic. My Bua is very talkative and likes to talk but A’s Dad talks less. My mom and A’s mom are similar in terms of their talking habits, they say whatever they feel :). So when we got to the restaurant, I was a little nervous in the beginning. As soon as we sat down, A’s Grandmom asked him to give me the flower bouquet that A had brought. A’s niece had also planned to give me a hand made congratulations card but she forgot to bring it. After that, we found a good private place to sit. A and I were given the job to order food. After the initial introduction, we looked at the menu and started to order. Then my Bua started the conversation. They generally talked about the wedding date(which was already calculated by a family priest of A’s family), supari day and the reception day. As Bua is not shy to talk, he was constantly speaking and A’s Dad was smiling and nodding with occasional laugh. It was a long table and I was at the other end of the table. All I could hear was Bua’s voice and A’s Dad’s laugh. In the meantime, A’s Grandmom and Mom were very sweet and talking to me and my Mom. Their discussion was generally about how we met and what were our future plans, they were constantly asking us about our plan to come back and live in Nepal. A’s sister was also taking part in the conversation and all of them very nice to me. My initial nervousness had settled by this time and we were merrily taking pictures and enjoying food. I was especially glad because Bua included me and asked me before fixing any date or deciding upon the ceremonies, it made me feel special and equally respected(usually this doesn’t happen in a tradition Nepali family but times are changing for good now). At the end of the meeting, both parties were happy and A’s Grandmom, Mom and sister took pictures with me. After that all of us took a group picture and we returned back home.
I can’t believe it was 4 months back, it feels like yesterday :). In 2 month A and I will be married. It all feels like a dream, how we met and now we are getting married :). I am looking forward to spending my life with A but I’m a little nervous about the wedding too.